Fantasy…sometimes it’s never meant to be a reality.

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Sexual Fantasy and Reality have often merged in my life…or maybe criss-crossed is more accurate. In my experience when fantasy-made-real mirrors the landscape of my actually reality, it truly lives up to expectations; however, when the realization of fantasy skips too many reality-boundaries…it leaves me…disappointed. And not for the reasons you assume…

A Realized sexual fantasy leaves me disappointed because, now…it can no longer be a fantasy again…it must necessarily be retired from fantasy-rotation to become…just…a fading memory.

Strange…maybe. But, maybe not.

Making fantasies into actuality is complicated business. Fantasies are necessarily fluid, they float across our consciousness with unlimited options for malleability..not so, in real life. Real life is tethered to another’s (or multiple others) desires/wants/feeling/expectations…your fantasies are all yours.

Some welcome that unknowability. I think it allows for too many unintentional complications. It’s a fantasy. It’s simple. It’s deviant. It’s downright disgusting! And…maybe…Sometimes, it’s best to…Keep it that way!

I will never forgive myself for making the fantasy of a threesome, reality…not because I feel guilty…or because it was a bad experience…neither apply…rather…because…I can NEVER have that fantasy, again.

May all your fantasies…cross the barrier into reality…and back…again, xxx Dr. NB.

(image by exphoria inc. for nudephotobasics.com)

Masturbation…

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We all do it…and yet it continues to carry an inherent level of shame. Not to the extreme, rather it’s not something we include in daily exchanges…even with close friends, we focus on the method rather than the intimacies (fantasies)…and maybe…that’s perfectly okay…they are after all…just…for…us.

“She imagined herself both queen and slave, dominatrix and victim. In her imagination she was making love with men of all skin colors–white, black, yellow–with homosexuals and beggars. She was anyone’s, and anyone could do anything to her. She had one, two, three orgasms, one after another. She imagined everything she had never imagined before, and she gave herself to all that was most base and most pure.” (Coelho)

Dr.NB

The ‘Brave Ones’ Respond to ‘Prostate Massage and Male Multiple Orgasm’

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After re-posting a blog singing the praises of prostate massage during sexual play…I put out a “call” for real-life experiences…and here’s what I got!

“It’s gotta be done right or it can be painful!”

“As long as the bros can get past butt hole hang ups, it’s a pretty spectacular event.”

“One day I hope to live in world where men will get rid of their butt hole hang ups! Lol.”

“It’s amazing. Only experienced once. Girls don’t know how to do it right. Ha ha ha.”

“I witnessed a man being fisted by his wife he seemed to enjoy it! She started with fingers, then different dildos from small to large, then fist almost to elbow. I myself have given a prostate massage while performing oral. He got very erect and ejaculated quickly! I have also strapped on with a man and he loved it! Lol. I guess its not for everyone but if done correctly can be very satisfying.”

“There is definitely a strong physiological response to having the prostate massaged.”

“The prostate is about the size of a walnut. Best results are one finger inside and moving forward in the same manner as you would stimulate a woman’s “g spot” and at the same time the thumb on the pyraneum placing pressure on the opposite side in a motion similar to rolling a walnut around between those same 2 fingers.”

“don’t know about a guy having multiple orgasms– If u mean one orgasm flowing into a second orgasm. But I have seen men have insane prostate orgasms. Not every guy likes it, but for some, a prostate orgasm is much more intense than a regular orgasm. Aneros toys are good for this. For extra intensity–place a vibrator at the end of the Aneros toy (when the Aneros is inside you). That’s my 2 cents.”

“It’s hot to perform or watch. The experience is unlike any other!There is also an incredible health benefit to prostate massage. In healthy men it wards off prostate issues and reduces symptoms in men who already have them. A fave product is the Aneros…it can be worn all day comfortably for heath benefits or used more aggressively during play. Worth trying for any man who can get over the ‘but I’m not gay’ hurdle.”

there are a plethora of toys, instructional videos and first-hand advice for those “braves” ones out there (wink)…Enjoy and Cheers and a very Happy New Year to all! Dr. NB.

 

Dazed & (not so) Confused: A Contemporary Sex Survey

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Recently (September 2014), Dazed (a digital arts and culture magazine) published the results from their large scale (114 countries, 10,500 participants) sex survey exploring:

“What you want, who you want and how you do it from the screen to the bedroom.”

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Suspending my need for scientific rigor, there are some fascinating findings from the study, which focused primarily on today’s youth, dubbed, generation swipe:

INTERNET

  • Men are twice as likely to lie about their identity online.
  • 50% of us send naked selfies, but if you like sex when you’re high, or have had sex with more than one person in a day, you’re notably more likely.
    • 40% of you like having sex on drugs, and 36% have had sex with more than one person in a day. If you’re that way inclined, you’re more likely to be the type to send over a naked picture to a significant other

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  • Gay men use apps to get laid will surprise no one, but still, the numbers were striking – more than 50% primarily use apps to hook up, compared with the heterosexual 10%.
  • 28% of Americans felt that technology made their sex lives more neurotic, less erotic.

PORN

  • Consumption and viewing of porn has been transformed:
    • 25% of respondents never watch pornography, 59% watch it one to five times a week, and 16% six or more times.
    • While the majority of women indulge at least once a week, only 4% do so six or more times a week, compared with 60% of men who watch it nearly every day or more.

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“Straight women’s consumption of lesbian porn outstrips men’s: only gay or bisexual women watch more girl-on-girl. The fact that twice as many girls chose “other” as their favorite porn type than guys, for example, suggests that mainstream porn does not cater for women’s needs as well as it does their male equivalents.”

  • >50% of all respondents have never had sex on camera, 34% have: about two thirds of this group regarded it as positive experience which they’d like to repeat, and 9% of all respondents – said they would never do it again.

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HEALTH

  • 44% use protection all the time, 46% some of time, 10% never.
    • Gay men are the most careful demographic, with half always using a condom, and less than 5% saying never, the lowest of any demographic.
    • Gay women, alternatively, use protection the least, with over two thirds never using protection, and under 20% using it always.

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LOVE

  • 1 in 5 of us see polyamory as the perfect set-up.
    • Straight guys are bigger fans of multiple-partner relationships than straight girls.
  • Bisexual people of both genders are least likely to identify with monogamy as the perfect domestic set-up, and the most likely to favour a poly relationship.
  • 8% say that love is “everything”, while 32% said that it meant nothing.
  • A resounding 75% said that sex was important or very important, with only 3% saying it was unimportant.
    • sex was more essential to women than men – with more gay and bisexual women rating it as “important or very important” than their male counterparts.

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While we can wonder about confounding factors, or the soundness of the study design, etc…we cannot discount the interesting nature of some of these findings or the fact that they reflect some real shifts in our sexual realities…some good, some not so much…but, overall it’s striking (and pleasing) to see that we are becoming much more open and accepting when it comes to variant sexual expressions and our responsible enjoyment of…it ALL! 😉 xxx Dr. NymphoBrainiac.

Wet Wednesday…Yes, All Women Can Squirt, Gush…It’s a Biological Function.

I originally posted this blog some time ago…it was for a series I was covering on adult toys…however, recently a friend asked me about g-spot orgasms…and I thought I would revisit the post. I think we can all agree that the pathway to female orgasm is filled with myth and emotion, and yet it doesn’t have to be. Squirting or gushing, is a biological function when the g-spot area is stimulated; therefore, every woman CAN experience this type of orgasm…with a little patience and persistence. I have included some details along with my own experience below…enjoy, ladies…it IS hump-day after all 😉 xxx dr.c.

Welcome to: WET WEDNESDAYS!!!

For our first adventure, I present to you, the 10 Function Risque G Vibrator Waterproof 5.5 Inch Black (as shown below)

IMMEDIATE REVIEW: I JUST finished trying out this product, the Risque G Vibrator, and I must admit…I am still shaking a bit!

WOWZAS WHAT A VIBRATOR!!

I mean first and foremost I KNOW it’s a special G-spot vibe…but…ummmm…in terms of clitoral stimulation

THIS IS YOUR TOY!

Product Description:
3 popular styles now with 10 functions.Seamless, sleek, and super slim.
10 intense functions of vibration, pulsation, and escalation.
Whisper quiet.
State-of-the-art memory chip resumes last function used.ABS with PU Cote (wand)
ABS with Silver Plating (2 AAA batteries)
5.5″ x .75″/14 cm x 2 cm.

Product Review/Test Run:

Quite honestly I didn’t even get the chance to TRY the G-spot “hook” inserted until I recovered from the cyclic orgasms that the 10-speed vibrator illicits! The vibration is VERY strong and the speeds vary in intensity and rhythm, which combine in a titillatingly surprising manner! Not to mention, when you turn it off the memory chip recalls the “orgasm point” from your last use – I knew it was only a matter of time before technology invaded the world of adult toys! INGENIOUS!

As if all this wasn’t enough, the Thin-Mint (yes, I already named mine) is also a G-spot stimulator, and stimulate it does. Yes, I know what you’re saying, “What is all this G-spot business?” I recognize the G-spot isn’t at all that familiar to many and so I have integrated commentary from an additional source (Babeland, NYC) with my own experiences below for your enjoyment:

HOW DO I FIND MY G-SPOT?

It’s not a myth, despite what you may have heard — the G-spot exists, and it loves attention! “G-spot” is the common name for a spot on the front of the vaginal wall through which you can stimulate the urethral sponge, an area of spongy tissue surrounding the urethra. All female-bodied people have a G-spot, but not all respond to G-spot stimulation in the same way.

  1. Find it. The G-spot is about 2 inches inside of the vagina towards the belly, just behind the pubic bone. When women are aroused the tissue becomes thickened and can be felt through the vaginal wall. It creates an intense, distinctive sensation when stimulated. For some women, this feeling is similar to the sensation of needing to urinate; if it makes you feel more comfortable, pee before starting your explorations. And for some, stimulation of the G-spot can make them ejaculate.
  • I have found both of these experiences to be true: I feel like I “must pee,” I experience a female-ejaculation…AND the orgasms are without fail unique and extremely intense.

Turn yourself on. The first step is to get turned on. During arousal, the spongy tissue swells with fluid.

  • This was simple, using the vibe for clitoral stimulation paired with a little fantasy.

Add a finger or toy. Now, insert your finger into your vagina and curve your finger up towards your belly.

  • You will notice that the vibe is hooked, I simply used it to find my “spot”.

Firm strokes. You’ll know when you hit the G-spot by the distinctive sensation it creates. Remember, you aren’t feeling for something on the surface of the vaginal wall; the urethral sponge is behind it, so you’ll need to press. The texture of the G-spot feels somewhat bumpy or crinkly; it’s noticeably different than the smooth walls of the vagina. Press firmly and stroke your fingers towards your palm (move them in a “come hither” way).

  • Again this was accomplished with use of the toy…and it was evident that I had “hit” the G-spot when an increasingly intense feeling of sensation and pressure began.

Experiment. There is no single “right” technique to find the the G-spot. Others really like to have their clitoris stimulated at the same time that their G-spot is stroked. A partner’s fingers stroking the G-spot during cunnilingus can feel simply divine.

  • Once I was really going, I added the bullet for clitoral stimulation.

Ejaculate (or not)! Pressure on the G-Spot or the contractions of orgasm can cause female ejaculation from the urethral sponge through the urethra. This fluid is different from urine and similar to men’s prostatic fluid. Empty your bladder before sex, so you won’t worry about peeing. Ejaculate quantity will probably be less than a teaspoon or two, but sometimes it can be copious. Objects in the vagina may block the urethra, thus preventing ejaculation. Some women ejaculate after the penis, dildo or fingers is removed. While not every woman ejaculates, female ejaculation is not uncommon, and it’s perfectly normal (and can feel great!).

  • Yes, I do this. I did this, just now, copiously! The first time I experienced this phenomenon it was with a partner and the source of a bit of embarrassment until I understood its source. My advice is, “go with it,” this is a natural reaction to intense pleasure and will be an orgasm like no other! We are so very lucky, us women, able to cum multiple times; our orgasms having such variant qualities.

Partners and sexual positions. During partner sex there are some positions that are more conducive for hitting the G-Spot than others. Think geometry. Unless your partner has a curved dildo or penis, it’s the cervix, not the G-spot, that will most likely be stimulated in the standard missionary pose. Doggy-style, or the receptive partner receiving a dildo or penis from behind, puts the G-spot in the bulls-eye a bit better. You can lift your upper body by supporting your hands against a wall or bed, or with the use of “sex furniture” like the Love Bumper, and create a more angled approach to the vagina. Many women find that if they are on top, they can control penetration for better G-spot stimulation.

  • For me, if I am “folded in half” with a sizeable partner, I can easily achieve a G-spot orgasm. Though I will say that at first I had to learn to withstand the intense, almost uncomfortable, pressure that precedes the phenomenal pay-off! I have tried various positions both with a male partner, and with the help of a strap-on with a female partner. The strap-on was a challenge, but I think utilizing this particular vibe would address the geometry issues that were encountered (and I can’t wait to try that theory out). 

This brings my first installment of Wet Wednesdays to a close! Thank you to Katerina’s Closet, please feel free to share any of your adventures with sex toys…share and share alike, I always say!

xxx c.

What the Heck…A Dildo-Maker?!

Turn Objects Into Sex Toys With The Dildomaker

The Dildomaker is a pencil sharpener-esque device that shaves an object into the shape of a dingaling. The gadget is brought to us by designer Francesco Morackini.

I am assuming this is a concept piece…because in actually usage I am wondering how often this would be used, I mean do we require this much variety? Or maybe it’s about volume? I must admit my mind is racing…scanning my space for current applicable objects and wondering if this is a “must have” for an all girls school. Naughty thoughts aside…it’s a creative idea!

Happy Hump Day, dr.c.

 

Via IncredibleThings

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Sex Dolls…are (Just) Real Enough (NSFW)

via The Daily Grind

The following content is re-blogged…it was just too interesting NOT to grab!

Sex dolls have fascinated me since the first “Real Doll” days and I always assumed that awkward outcasts integrated these synthetic bodies into their emotional as well as sexual lives (see the film “Lars and the Real Girl” for further detail).

However, the more “real” these dolls get (now there is a male version, which looks creepily like someone I know and love, intimately…ha! Imagine that parallel!) and the further and further we de-volve from actual human face-to-face interactions, I begin to wonder…are animatronic or cyborg-like lovers the answer to our future sexual-selves?

Makes one go…hmmmmnnn…But, until then…enjoy the synthetic-man-woman-sex-doll porn below…and feel free to leave your opinion…. xxx dr.c.


These Synthetic Life-Size Sex Dolls Are The Creepiest (Or Hottest) Thing You’ll See Today [NSFW]

If you are in the market for “the most beautiful and the highest quality silicone manikins in the world,” then you are in luck! U.S. company Sinthetics manufactures life-size silicone sex dolls in every imaginable color and gender, and their sexual orientation is up to you of course.

The dolls come with interchangeable flaccid and erect penises and both cut and uncut models depending on how you like your men.

Male Sinthetics start at $5,900 plus shipping, and any upgrades will add to the final price tag.

A small price to pay for an obedient sex companion that will never cheat on you.

Tour the very NSFW gallery below:

And yes, they do have female silicone sex dolls. Meet “Willow”: